A new feature: Dr. Saturday Twitter readers offer their abbreviated thoughts on the relevant issues of the day, and I pass the cream along to you. Today: Who has the best name in the 2010 recruiting class?

• DB Wave Ryder, Utah State Navy. "Bonus: He's from Hawaii." Demerit: He's bound for the wave-less dunes of Logan, Utah. Double Bonus: Was not forced to change surname for show business, like Winona Ryder. Triple Bonus: An alert e-mailer points out that, contrary to his now-outdated Rivals profile, Wave has in fact backed out of his commitment to Utah State and is en route to the most perfect of all destinations: Navy. Yes, Wave Ryder will ride the waves, literally, as a Midshipman. It is his destiny.

Demerit: Still much harder to hook up with Winona Ryder if the opportunity arises.

• WR Necho Beard, Nevada. "Because 'Neck' Beard or 'Nacho' Beard would've been too obvious."

• QB Munchie Legaux, Cincinnati. (Right) Further comment will only diminish the lustrousness of this bayou masterpiece. Brian Kelly is considering ditching Notre Dame to return to the Bearcats, because he can't pass up the opportunity to be associated with it.

• DB Furious Bradley, Southern Miss. Sports Illustrated's Andy Staples argues this is an even better moniker than "Munchie Legeaux." Why? "Muchie's real first name is Benton. Furious' real first name is Furious."

• LB Chi Chi Ariguzo, Northwestern. "I'll have the fried ice cream, please."

• QB D'Angelo Barksdale, San Diego. "See, the king stay the king, a'ight? Everything stay who he is. Except for the pawns."

• DB Asian Ruff, Uncommitted. Some mid-level program in the South (probably Arkansas) is getting a big safety who is definitely not Asian, although he does bear a startling resemblance to a medium-sized wading bird that breeds in marshes and wet meadows across northern Eurasia.

• LB Myles Davis, Syracuse. Too cool for this sort of low-brow fare, frankly, but will his hardcore Orange fans stick with him when he decides to get a little "experimental" with his game as an upperclassmen?

• RB Storm Johnson, Miami. "Name a kid 'Storm' and it's 50-50 that he's either going to grow up to play for the Hurricanes or spend his life boosting cars." (Why not both, Michael Irvin always said ...)

• OL Jose Jose, Central Florida. "It's It's gotta gotta be be Jose Jose. Right? Right? /obvs /obvs." When you weigh 355 pounds, you can have as many names as you need, brother.

Forget next year's list: The point is moot in 2011, when all comers are shamed by the luminscence of God's Power Offor. That race, it is finished.

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Thanks to followers Worst Fan, Dan Rubenstein, Hail To Purple, Ryan Matts, Friends of the Program, The Vermonster and AG Buck. Follow Dr. Saturday on Twitter at @DrSaturday.

When Auburn hired Gene Chizik away from Iowa State in December 2008, the move was so universally panned by baffled pundits and torch-wielding Tiger partisans alike that premature obituaries didn't seem too farfetched before Chizik had even coached a game. Auburn had just fired one of the most successful coaches in school history, Tommy Tuberville, a man who had led an undefeated season and six straight wins over hated Alabama, and was already beginning to quiver in the shadow of the looming Death Star being constructed by Nick Saban across the state. Even conservative, old-school outlets like the Birmingham News, "Five-and-Nineteen Gene," was greeted as a lightweight in a heavy artillery fight:

One former SEC assistant heard the news and laughed out loud.

One former Auburn assistant who worked alongside Chizik reacted with stunned silence.

One college football insider who knows both the current Alabama boss and the man Auburn has chosen to battle him said Chizik is a good coach - but Nick Saban will eat him for breakfast.

No word on whether it'll be before or after his daily Little Debbies.

A couple months after that, Saban reeled in the nation's top-ranked class for the second straight year as a prelude to a long-awaited national championship. Chizik's debut at Auburn, meanwhile, was more or less the meh campaign everyone expected.

Yet when the recruiting gurus wrap up the post-signing day rankings this afternoon, the Tigers' first full haul under Chizik is going to be right alongside Alabama's as one of everyone's top five incoming classes nationally (slightly ahead of the Tide's crop, actually, if you want to split hairs), spinning Big Cat Weekend and the Hummer limo in high school parking lots and all the other sideshow aspects of the Auburn hard sell last spring and summer in a less eye-rolling light: Obviously, hyped-up 18-year-old kids appreciate the sideshows.

In this class, that goes double for the out-of-state kids: The Tigers got out of Alabama to coax signatures from Rivals' top-ranked players in Arkansas (five-star running back Michael Dyer), Mississippi (five-star offensive tackle Shon Coleman) and Louisiana (high four-star receiver Trovon Reed) as well as the the top-ranked junior college prospect in the nation (quarterback Cam Newton, an Atlanta native who was originally the mega-hyped heir apparent to Tim Tebow at Florida before transferring to lead Blinn College (Texas) to a JUCO national championship). They picked up a nod from elite Florida defensive end Corey Lemonier at the last minute, on top of multiple four-star prospects from Georgia and another pair of top JUCO players from Kansas and California. They did well enough in-state, despite losing the three highest-rated players to the Tide, to land four of Alabama's top 10. And unlike 'Bama, which lost hyped safety Keenan Allen to Cal, didn't suffer any last-second defections from its expected commitments. It's a better haul than anyone had any right to expect at Auburn even two months ago.

All of which may be redeemed for 30 seconds' worth of bragging rights and four years' worth of increased expectations. There's a reason the Tigers' bumper crop has met with so much surprise next to Alabama's day at the office: If Chizik can't convert that momentum into another January bowl and another celebrated class next winter, he'll be right back where he started, because Nick Saban's shadow isn't going anywhere anytime soon.

How did a 275-pound, two-star running back/defensive lineman who runs a 4.8 40-yard dash manage to wring a last-second offer to join a star-studded Auburn class that already included one five-star power back and ranks among the best incoming crops in school history? Because Ladarious Phillips hits the hole hard, baby:

WARNING: Female readers are encouraged to consult their physician before clicking 'play.'

For ignoring the stereotypes of his position and slow-jamming his way into the hearts and pants of Tiger fans across the Plains, Ladarious succeeds 2009 winner Sam Barrington as Dr. Saturday's Recruit of the Year. We'll be watching you Ladarious: Do the groove proud.

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Video hat tip: Friends of the Program.

I'd like to think this is the idea of an especially committed dadaist in Washington's art school, or a disgruntled athletic department employee seeking to exact the most boring possible vengeance on rabid Husky fans. Honestly, though, I don't doubt for a second the deep sincerity of every one of the 100-plus people on CoachSark.com as U-Dub commitments send in their official letters of intent Wednesday morning, dutifully watching a live stream of a fax machine:

Yeah, it may not play because the maximum number of viewers has been reached. And they're not even putting the kids' names on a board!

Making the morning rounds.

• Urban: Cowboy? The tall tales swirling around Urban Meyer since he announced his (apparently fictional) leave of absence in December have been divine, including the persistent speculation that Meyer planned to step down as soon as the nation's best recruiting class was secure. But none quite tops the wholly absurd word Tuesday that opposing coaches told recruits Meyer was bound for the Dallas Cowboys after signing day, per incoming Gator signee Mack Brown: "They would say, he's tricking ya'll — he's going to the NFL to coach the Dallas Cowboys. I was like 'What?' There's no way." Mack had better hope not, for his sake: His official letter of intent is already in Meyer's hands this morning. [Orlando Sentinel]

• Kiffin be closin'. USC is waiting on many recruits today -- including the biggest name on the board, Minnesota offensive lineman Seantrel Henderson -- but the Trojans have already landed one elite prospect, five-star Georgia receiver Markeith Ambles, who announced his decision on Atlanta TV moments ago. Ambles opted for The Kiffin Plan once already, when he committed to Tennessee over USC in December, and remains under Lane's sway as he and right-hand recruiting bear Ed Orgeron set up shop on the West Coast. If all goes as planned in L.A., Ambles can follow Kiffin to the NFL in three years, too. [Atlanta Journal-Constitution]

• Father knows hype. As for Henderson: The 6'8", 300-pound behemoth will anchor the day's festivities with a televised announcement gala in New York City this afternoon, and his dad knows what you're thinking. Let Sean Henderson set the record straight: "I'm not worried about it being over the top. One of the reasons we're going to New York is I want Seantrel to make his decision where he'll be in a neutral spot, where he'll feel good about it ... I didn't want him at school in some gym when he announces it, because there might be some 'yays' and there might be some 'nays.'" Very prudent, for a man consenting to put his teenage son on live television in the media capital of the world. [Columbus Dispatch]

• Da'Rick does Georgia Da'Wrong. Along with Ambles, Henderson and Allen, one of the more interesting recruiting dramas of the day will go down in Calhoun, Ga., where five-star receiver Da'Rick Rogers -- regarded by everyone as the best prospect out of Georgia this year, and possibly since Eric Berry in 2007 -- threatens to start a riot when he snubs the Bulldogs for Tennessee despite his longstanding commitment to UGA over the last year. One disgruntled Georgia fan started a Twitter feed Tuesday for the express purpose of harassing Rogers for his last-second defection to the Vols, which Da'Rick seemed to take in stride. [The Chattanoogan]

• I think we're in Kansas again, Toto. Miami linebacker Arthur Brown, older brother of last year's top-ranked recruiting diva, Bryce Brown, and a once-hyped prospect his own self, is not enrolled at Miami this semester and has returned to his hometown in Kansas "to be close to his family," according to a school spokesman. Brown hasn't requested a transfer from the 'Canes, but he won't be back for spring practice, and UM message boards have been calling him a goner for weeks. [Miami Herald]

How's this for signing day drama: As late as Monday, every one of Rivals' five main recruiting analysts pegged colossal Minnesota offensive lineman Seantrel Henderson, the highest-rated uncommitted prospect on everyone's board, as a Buckeye. Today, two of those five suddenly see Seantrel putting on USC colors when he does the silly hat thing today at his over-the-top announcement ceremony -- and it is a ceremony, set to be broadcast live on CBS College at 3 p.m. Eastern -- in New York City. The Trojans are feeling lucky. At least some Buckeyes are not. Such is the power of Lane Kiffin.

The day's biggest mystery, though, seems to have already slipped through Kiffin's fingers: Five-star receiver and overly confident playa Markeith Ambles -- a former Tennessee commit who warmed up to USC again when Kiffin bolted for Los Angeles last month, and who was teasing Volunteer, Tar Heel and "Trogan" fans online Tuesday night -- woke up wearing a North Carolina beanie on his Twitter page and "feeling good about [the] choice" he made last night.

Then again, maybe Ambles is just setting up the Heels for the most elaborately, cruelly constructed hat trick yet -- and still, it couldn't hope to match the Song of Keenan Allen for last-second drama.

Sure, you can feel guilty about stalking the whims of teenagers via social media, but you may as well go ahead and face it: This is your day. Hopefully, you're one of the lucky ones for whom the recruiting bug only bites for the first Wednesday every February. If so, welcome to obsession, and do not be ashamed. It comes with the territory.

The press conference hat trick by highly sought recruits is so thoroughly played, so jejune, that I almost have to commend hyped, five-star South Carolina running back Marcus Lattimore for attempting to breathe new life into the form tonight in Spartanburg. Start with a pair of finalists, Auburn and the home-state Gamecocks. Set the proceedings in a church, for that reverent, spiritual atmosphere all 18-year-olds deserve. Add Spartanburg native, former Auburn great and quasi-mentor Stephen Davis, give him an orange Auburn cap to hand Lattimore for dramatic effect, drown out the proceedings in the most annoying techno-based hype song in amateur sports, and voila: You have an over-the-top recruiting press conference that almost manages to be more entertaining that annoying.

Yeah, almost. But somehow, it sounds even more pretentious in print:

Lattimore kept fans in suspense until the last minute.

He invited former Auburn tailback and Columbia resident Stephen Davis to the front of the church. Davis, who also grew up in Spartanburg, gave Lattimore an Auburn hat, prompting some shouts of "Auburn" from some in the crowd of of 300 or so. But then Lattimore pulled a Gamecock hat out from under the Auburn cap and put the garnet hat on.
[...]
"That's here my heart is," Lattimore said. "And (Steve Spurrier) did the Cha-Cha Slide with my mama."

Okay, I admit, the Ol' Ball Coach doing whatever "the Cha-Cha Slide" is with Lattimore's mother would have made his announcement easily the best recruiting press conference to date, while significantly lowering the limbo bar for Nick Saban and Urban Meyer. As it is, South Carolina gets the top-rated running back in the country, the highest-rated recruit of Spurrier's five-year tenure and a potential cure for a ground game that's finished dead last in the SEC three years in a row. Good luck and good health back there, Marcus.

Last year, it was Oregon on a Thursday night, with a likely BCS bid on the line. This year, Boise State's heavy-hitting opener against Virginia Tech will be on an even bigger stage: The schools announced today the week one showcase in Washington's FedEx Field has been moved to Labor Day, one of the most coveted time slots of the season -- a nation of fat, full, sunburned fans returning home from the holiday layabout returning home to a pair of likely top-10 teams with no competition from Monday Night Football amounts to a fairly captive audience. Last year's Labor Day title between Miami and Florida State was briefly the most watched regular season game in ESPN history (surpassed only by USC's visit to Ohio State the following weekend), and it's exactly the kind of showcase Boise State needs to launch its darkhorse campaign as a national contender.

The Bronco bandwagon, clearly bound for the BCS after pantsing the Ducks in a late-night romp last September, has a bigger destination in its sights this time around: With the cred of three undefeated regular season in four years, the momentum of last month's Fiesta Bowl win over TCU and an entire offseason of hype over 20 returning starters from the team that landed the highest poll finish in school history an opening night reprise against the Hokies could set BSU on a course for the BCS title game. That may be a bold assumption, but it's one the Broncos have earned, just as they earned the assumption last year that an eventual BCS bid was in the works after clearing their only significant hurdle against Oregon. The more they win, the higher the stakes become.

Of course, the Labor Day spot can cut the other way -- no one would hesitate to dismiss the Broncos from their brief stay among the elite with a high-profile loss in their biggest game of the year, and Virginia Tech will be out to make a splash to kick off its own BCS campaign. With the exception of its pair of Fiesta Bowl upsets over Oklahoma and TCU, Boise hasn't been nearly as successful against major competition away from the blue turf. It couldn't ask for a better opportunity to overcome that stigma and put itself in position to actually compete for No. 1.

In draft terms, everybody who's anybody gets an invite to the NFL's February scouting combine in Indianapolis -- this year's official list of invitees, released Tuesday, reads more than 400 names long. It's more players than will accept invitations to Indy, and far, far more than will actually be taken off the draft board in April. Among those names are such luminaries as Stillman defensive end Junior Gallette, Hillsdale offensive tackle Jared Veldheer and James Madison defensive end Arthur Moats. If you've got a shot, they'll give you a look.

On the other hand, if you don't get a combine invite, the cold shoulder alone could be a career-ending disappointment. This year's notable combine snubs still have a chance at the next level, but it's almost certainly going to be a long, uphill climb in some random training camp:

• WR Freddie Barnes, Bowling Green. Former quarterback shattered the NCAA record with 155 catches last year, 19 of them for touchdowns, and has decent size at 6'0", 212 pounds; some projections have tabbed Barnes as a middle-rounder for his reliability and consistency. Barnes' record-breaking campaign was more quantity than quality, though, and his production against the best teams the Falcons faced, Missouri and Boise State -- against whom he combined to average just 6.7 yards per catch with no touchdowns -- highlighted his inability to stretch the field against a competent secondary. (And in Mizzou's case, that's defining "competent" pretty loosely.)

• RB Damion Fletcher, Southern Miss. USM's all-time rushing leader passed Herschel Walker and LaDainian Tomlinson into eighth place on the NCAA's career rushing list in his final game, on the same night he became just the ninth player ever over 1,000 yards on the ground in all four college seasons. But Fletch was never going to impress scouts with his size or speed, and his production declined over the last two years to the point that he was just another piece in the Eagles' increasingly pass-happy attack, rather than the workhorse he'd been early in his career. Essentially, he was as good as he's going to be as a true freshman, and that's not good enough to command attention from the NFL.

• QB Matt Grothe, South Florida. A torn ACL a month into his senior season may have sealed Grothe's fate, but the Big East's all-time leader in total yards was a quintessential "college quarterback" from the beginning, a sub 6-footer sidewinder prone to bailing from the pocket and embarking on the occasional sandlot-style scramble drill. That led to some big plays and a Favre-like reputation for "just having fun out there," but it also led to a Favre-like penchant for dumb turnovers: Grothe tossed 14 picks in each of his three full seasons as a starter, leaving him with more career interceptions than any other active college passer.

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Everybody wants North Carolina safety Keenan Allen: The mega-hyped, five-star prospect covers ground "like a smooth jungle cat," and since he reportedly dropped his standing commitment to Alabama late last week, the field for his services is suddenly wide open again as the hours tick down to Wednesday's signing day. The decision may come down in part to blood -- Allen's half-brother, Zach Maynard, fled the starting quarterback job at Buffalo amid the Bulls' coaching change last month, and any team that wants Allen may have to take a flier on a MAC transfer as part of the deal. Allen and Maynard have visited Cal and Clemson together the past two weekends and plan to announce their decisions together at a Wednesday press conference.

But Alabama's not taking the apparent snub lying down; no, the Tide have only begun to fight. And if it's blood you're interested in, Keenan Allen, Tide fans are here (and on your Facebook page) to assure you: If you choose Tuscaloosa, there will be blood.

No, Eric Harrison. No you do not.

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Hat tip: Friends of the Program.