A weekly look at conquered favorites and other notables picking up the pieces of shattered ambition.

We're proud to suck only slightly less. As expected, the Apple Cup brought us perhaps the most pathetic moment in football history -- not during the game, but after it, as Washington State fans react to a last-second win over a winless, hapless, essentially coach-less rival:

It was one of the worst losses in Washington history for many, many reasons. Two different Husky kickers combined to miss three potentially game-winning field goals in the fourth quarter and overtime. With a three-point lead, the Huskies punted on 4th-and-3 from the Cougar 40 with two minutes to play, when a first down might have iced the game. Their badly blown coverage in the final minute allowed true freshman Jared Karstetter to run behind the entire Washington secondary for a 48-yard gain that set up the Cougars' tying field goal on the last play of regulation.

But mostly, the bungled victory all but assures the Huskies of a winless Pac-10 season after next week's inevitable loss to Cal, an 0-12 season overall, and with a loss to what looked for all the world like the worst team in Pac-10 history, a seat at the head of the conference's all-time hall of shame:

It turns out that Washington State can't be considered among the worst teams in the history of college football. The Cougars can't even claim being the most pitiful in their own state. ...
[...]
"We just lost to the Cougars," linebacker Donald Butler said, sounding disgusted, surprised and resigned all at once.
Beyond that, Butler had trouble forming sentences.

"It, it, it ... I'm speechless," he said.

Not speechless: Former UW quarterback Hugh Millen, a consistent Ty Willingham critic on Husky radio, who apparently called the outgoing coach a "chump" for hanging Karstetter's long reception on freshman corner Quenton Richardson. ("... it was the right defense," and "You just wonder what's through that young man's head.") They may hate you now, Ty, but what are they going to do without you?

Console that Tiger. You knew LSU's quarterback situation was bad. But it doesn't get much lower, really, than actually getting a queasy feeling that the offense is worse off as you watch pick-six king Jarrett Lee go down en route to the team falling below .500 in the SEC for the first time since ... since ... since when, exactly?

So how far back is the program now?

To 1999, [the last time] LSU had [as many] home losses (three) and [as many] SEC losses ... a 3-8 run that included a 1-7 SEC mark? ...

To 2002, the last time LSU had four losses, going 8-5 and losing to Texas in the Cotton Bowl?

Those are also the last times LSU had real quarterback controversies, though nothing like this season's hellish rotation. And the Valley Shook is willing to go much deeper than the quarterback problems, though, especially since they thought true freshman Jordan Jefferson played OK in his first extended action and didn't make any huge mistakes:

A lot of people are going to point to our QB situation and point out how we've been devastated by injuries and dismissals at the position, and that's all true. But it doesn't explain why the Ole Miss defensive spent the entire game in our backfield. It doesn't explain why we can't cover wide receivers.

The quarterbacks also don't explain why the Tigers are currently tenth in the conference in total defense and next-to-last in passing defense, categories it's traditionally dominated. I would say the quarterbacks don't explain why they're also also next-to-last in scoring defense, as well, except that, with Lee and his seven INTs returned for touchdown, it does, to an extent. At any rate, this you can practically guarantee: The co-coordinator experiment on defense will officially end before the bowl game.

The Great Boomerang of '08. Roughly 57.9 percent of the readers of the Minneapolis Star-Tribune were so fed up with the Gophers' 55-0 debacle against Iowa, and their four-game slide in general to close the regular season, that they'd just as soon skip a bowl game altogether than accept the fruits of a team that finished this year, at 7-5, looking much worse than it did at the end of 2007, when it was 1-11. At least that teamed looked somewhat competitive in its home finale, against Wisconsin. Saturday's debacle in the Metrodome -- the last game the school will ever play there, if it's outdoor, on-campus stadium opens in time for 2009 -- was the worst Big Ten loss in Minnesota history. And that is a long, long history.

The Daily Gopher notes that, despite a dramatically better defense and turnover margin and the most improved record in the country over 2007, the Gopher offense actually regressed in pretty much every way: Fewer yards, fewer points, fewer touchdowns, more three-and-outs, more punts and a dramatically lower third down percentage in the same number of possessions. So let the debate begin: Just how much better was Minnesota, anyway?

Elsewhere in Disillusion ... Texas Tech is moving forward, remembering cool moments in Norman, putting the loss in perspective, etc. Where is the angst and property damage? ... It was the same old Arizona, putting its fans through the ringer in Saturday's last-second loss to Oregon State. ... And BYU is proud to be back in the Las Vegas Bowl for the fourth year in a row. Seriously. Mormons love Vegas, right?