Dr. Saturday - NCAAF

First of all, a celebration: Last week was the first full week of February without a single Dr. Saturday post or news item focusing in any way on Lane Kiffin, Lane Kiffin apologies, Lane Kiffin haters, Lane Kiffin satire or Lane Kiffin violating obscure recruiting rules. Truly a milestone!

Alas, all good times must end. You'd think that by now, Kiffin and fellow ex-Southern Cal assistant Ed Orgeron would be distancing themselves somewhat from the unorthodox recruiting tactics they picked up on Pete Carroll's staff at USC: They tried the smoke machine entrance -- that's a violation (another ex-Carrollite, new Washington bos Steve Sarkisian, was hit with the same penalty in January). They tried the fake press conference -- that's a violation.

With that record, when it comes to a Trojan tactic like, say, ripping off your shirt and leading teenage prospects in a testosterone-fuelled man-chant ...

... will the new Volunteer honchos think twice? They will not:

When asked what [Markeith Ambles'] top highlight was from his one day spent in Knoxville, he quickly responded.

"We were in a dark theater and all of a sudden they turned on the lights and the coaches ripped off their shirts," Ambles said with a laugh."It was like in the army and it got crunk up in there. Some of the players that were in there did some chants. It got crunk."

("It was like in the army." Readers are encouraged to ask veterans, especially older vets, in the family how they would rate their military service in terms of "crunkness.")

Another recruit, Brian Vogler, confirms Ambles' account and adds a few details, emphasizing that the "intensity" was cranked up to 11 moments earlier, when players were separated from their parents; Denzel McCoy backs up the story in the Atlanta Journal-Constitution. This being the SEC, the truly frightening ramification is that the rest of the league is obliged to keep pace in the "shirtless man chant" arms race, which means either Rich Brooks and Steve Spurrier probably need to hit the gym, or their recruits at Kentucky and South Carolina should head immediately for the exits when the lights go off. (I assume prospects visiting Alabama head for the exits instinctively when the lights flicker and the room grows cold, signaling Nick Saban's approach, only to find the doors locked from the inside. Only then can the re-education begin ...)

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  1. conor b
    1. Posted by conor b Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:29 pm EDT

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    how about going a whole week without mentioning Lane freaking Kiffin.
  2. Joshgator
    2. Posted by Joshgator Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:41 pm EDT

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    Conor b...if only it were that easy for Matt H.....If "Lame Kitten" would stop making a fool out of himself, then there would be nothing for Matt H to write about the Kitten. However, since Lame keeps embarrassing himself and the University of Tennessee, Matt H has no choice but to write about it. I don't blame Matt H...I blame Lame Kitten. It will be so much fun to watch Lame getting chewed up and spit out by EVERY team in the SEC that he has pissed off...UF, Alabama, Georgia, South Carolina (LSU is wishing they could exact revenge on Lame this year for his comments, but LSU doesn't get the honor of pounding Tennessee into the dirt this year since they don't play this year). But for those of you LSU fans that are pissed at Lame, don't worry, the rest of us in the SEC will do some extra pounding of Tennessee in your honor :)
  3. big_hurt_jon
    3. Posted by big_hurt_jon Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:07 pm EDT

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    Damn right Conor B. I am hoping every SEC team rapes kiffin's lame ass. I just hope ole Nick Satan will run up the score on them like the rst of the SEC will do. I hate how Saban always lets his team go to sleep in the second half of a game indtead of putting the kill switch on. Ole Miss has the same problem, besides the whippin the put on Miss st, Florida has the right idea, it only had 3 games all year that they didnt blow the other team out. Alabama Florida was the real NC game.
  4. Colts18
    4. Posted by Colts18 Thu Sep 03, 2009 10:42 pm EDT

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    Just for the record if you read other articles about this (I've read 4 or 5 now) all of the interviewed recruits said that they liked this recruiting tactic and that Tennessee had jumped up on their list of schools. So joshgaytor, before you go off on tangents about Lane Kiffin embarrassing himself maybe you should do some research first, especially considering he wasn't even one of the coaches that ripped his shirt off.
    Thanks,
    Colts18
    http://classic17.wordpress.com/
  5. J
    5. Posted by J Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:34 pm EDT

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    WTF is Crunk?
  6. Joshgator
    6. Posted by Joshgator Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:41 pm EDT

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    4. Posted by Colts18 Mon Mar 02, 2009 4:41 pm EST Report Abuse
    Just for the record if you read other articles about this (I've read 4 or 5 now) all of the interviewed recruits said that they liked this recruiting tactic and that Tennessee had jumped up on their list of schools. So joshgaytor, before you go off on tangents about Lane Kiffin embarrassing himself maybe you should do some research first, especially considering he wasn't even one of the coaches that ripped his shirt off.
    Thanks,
    Colts18
    http://classic17.wordpress.com/
    Colts18...I like that...you used your ACTUAL IQ score in your handle...how cute. First of all, calling someone gay without knowing any facts is reprehensible. You should be ashamed of yourself. First, I am happily married to a wonderful woman. Second, I was not only referring to this most recent embarrassing tidbit about Lame Kitten. I was referring to his REPEATED foot-in-the-mouth embarrassments that that idiot has already done. I was also referring to how he has pissed off a LOT of people, especially, the "BIG GUYS" of the SEC who are now all chomping at the bit waiting to tear Lame Kitten to shreds in the upcoming season(S)--capital letter added for emphasis. Whether Lame Kitten ripped his shirt off or not is irrelevant as he (and his regime) have complicitly started or encouraged this type of behavior (need I remind you of the recruiting violations that Tennessee had to self-report since Lame took over?), has personally made slanderous and inaccurate statements that have not only pissed people off, but gotten him in trouble with the SEC (and no doubt soon the NCAA). The guy is slime and ALL of us in the SEC will be glad to kick Tennessee's butt back to the stone age until they fire Lame and his motley crew of misfits. Then maybe Tennessee can get back on track and hire a coach with class. As for you Colts18, take your low IQ out of here...we don't need your inane comments on these posts.
  7. Dallas S
    7. Posted by Dallas S Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:07 pm EDT

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    I think it's good stuff!! This year is all about CHANGE! And forsure us UT faithful need it! Also, when was the last time LSU "punded" Tennessee? They won the last two games by less than TD in the 4th Q? You may have fun this year but give them 2-3 years and you'll all the SEC schools takin off their shirts!
  8. Joshgator
    8. Posted by Joshgator Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:41 pm EDT

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    dallas s... "punded"?!?!? wtf is "punded"? your comment made absolutely no sense.
  9. mikemapes2
    9. Posted by mikemapes2 Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:20 pm EDT

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    Even better, How about going one day without mentioning Pete Carroll? Anyway, I thought the U$¢'s recruiting chant was "Show me the money!"
  10. Dallas S
    10. Posted by Dallas S Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:07 pm EDT

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    well, i'm guessing you're too stupid to know what a "typo" errror is gator puffer...
  11. Dallas S
    11. Posted by Dallas S Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:07 pm EDT

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    and before you start, that line was just for you josh...
  12. Joshgator
    12. Posted by Joshgator Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:41 pm EDT

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    Dallas S... You moron...of course I know what a typo is....however, you put it in quotes...as if you were trying to draw attention to it. You say that I'm "too stupid". Don't make me laugh... Then how is it I am a couple of days from earning my doctoral degree? You don't earn a doctoral degree if you are stupid. Signed me, Dr. Joshgator.
  13. andyg_bear
    13. Posted by andyg_bear Thu Sep 03, 2009 2:54 pm EDT

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    you don't earn a doctoral degree if you are stupid. signed me, dr. joshgator.
    gator fans....they'll reply to anything.
  14. dphysician
    14. Posted by dphysician Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:47 pm EDT

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    I think LaneK is a bast@$# and a genius-(when off the football field). He knew he had no shot at winning without stealing some high profile recruits. All the media attention was done on purpose. Who turns them selves in within hours of committing what you know to be rule violations. You want to commit the crime but not look like a shady program to the parents and players. It was a accident my A$$. Like the Obama team, he said what he needed to say to get the attention of the people he wanted at that time. It has worked to perfection. The real Q we should be asking can he do anything with it afterward. If we ban together in the SEC and cut him off any quality prospects over the next three years. He and his high profile overpaid team will be out of hear.
  15. Dallas S
    15. Posted by Dallas S Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:07 pm EDT

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    Dr. Joshgator, a doctoral degree doen't make you smart. I know plenty of stupid people who have fancy BA, MA and Doctoral degrees. I'm a CEO with less education so who's smarter? It's all about what you do outside that fancy paper and how well you perform. As for my boy Lane, the change will be felt throughout the SEC in the years to come. Live high on Teeblow and the gators because the Gators are soon going to be in a recession within the SEC.
  16. dean f
    16. Posted by dean f Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:39 pm EDT

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    Dear Lane:
    Gee, the shirtless man chant. What genius. We're in awe. We hope you're around for years to come.
    Signed,
    The other 11 SEC coaches
    (especially Nick Saban and Urban Meyer)
  17. dean f
    17. Posted by dean f Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:39 pm EDT

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    Dear Lane:
    We love the fact you're coaching the Vols. You really are great for business.
    Signed,
    The hotel where NCAA investigators stay every time they're in Knoxville.
  18. Candy R
    18. Posted by Candy R Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:17 pm EDT

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    First of all, time will tell when the teams will finally get to play football. I have been reading these comments for weeks now and it's getting old. Who cares about a couch ripping off his shirt. And they call this news Geez!! I have to agree with Jacob L. For weeks now Joshgator has been talking about his wonderful wife and his degree. This is about football ,not to spread your personal life. You keeping metioning about your degree, are you posting for a job? Lets's talk about football people!!!!
  19. Big O
    19. Posted by Big O Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:46 pm EDT

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    Within a couple of years all of you SEC schools will be kissing Lane's (Obamacrat's mascot).
  20. NoPars
    20. Posted by NoPars Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:40 pm EDT

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    Hey folks - I'm still trying to find out what Kiffin said about my beloved LSU Tigs! In the meantime keep up the spirited comments............
  21. Michael R
    21. Posted by Michael R Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:21 pm EDT

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    JoshGator just come out and admit that you are really married to a man and you're looking for a job. You wouldn't give a rats ass about the Vols in the past. But now that Tennessee has Kiffin you have done nothing but put him down and the Vols. Just admit it that you want kiffin. You are to obvious about the situation. Gators have beaten Tennessee for the past three years so what in the hell are you so insucure about? Your manhood? Your gator gayness? I know what it is, as a child you probably had a hound dog that stuck it to you from the rear end! You know Smokey turns you on.
  22. Joshgator
    22. Posted by Joshgator Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:41 pm EDT

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    Candya**, apparently you are illiterate. Go back and read my first post(s) and you will see that I WAS talking about football. I did not mention my wife or education until that retard Colts18 (he of the IQ of 18) made certain comments about me that were unrelated to football. If you read the above threads and still think that what you wrote is true, then do the world a favor and go away back into the woods where you are hidden from the rest of society!
  23. Joshgator
    23. Posted by Joshgator Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:41 pm EDT

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    That should have said Colts18...AND Dallas S
  24. Candy R
    24. Posted by Candy R Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:17 pm EDT

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    Wow A article you didnt bring it up, and you are talking about colts18, I cant tell you how that makes you look so stupid. This person happens to be one of the smartest players ever to come out of college and one the best role models not just for Tennessee Fans and players but for all NCAA Players. What players from florida that are in the NFL and are making somewhat of an impact on their teams. This would be like me saying something about Tebow, I dont know where you received your education,but with out a doubt you paid to much for it. And about me living in the woods, I live in Florida with the rest of you trashy rednecks. I never knew what redneck was till I moved to florida and couldnt believe in all of the rednecks and all of the non-educated people in this state. When I moved here I was already more than a year ahead of everybody else, because of the terrible education you have here.
  25. Joshgator
    25. Posted by Joshgator Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:41 pm EDT

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    Michael R... It is rude obnoxious morons like you that make Americans look bad to the rest of the world. Do the U.S. a favor and remove your tongue so you can't speak like a hateful moron anymore and remove your fingers so you stop spewing your ridiculous assertions with no factual merit. That way we are all spared from having to deal with a s***-for-brains waste of a human life like you. You want to talk football, let's talk football. You want to insult people, go to prison and insult "Bubba" the 6'7" 400 lb monster and let him destroy you (then the rest of the world will rejoice for Michael the Moron will be vanquished from annoying or nauseating anyone ever again. [and the citizens of Earth all cried out in unison "Hooray!!!"]

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