• Just the facts, please. Mark Herzlich's stunning cancer announcement Thursday is destined to launch a round of "inspirational" pablum, and then several more rounds as the All-American linebacker's recovery (hopefully) progresses and he returns to football, or doesn't. At least the Boston Globe is there this morning with some actual information:

• Herzlich's tumor -- a rare variety usually found in "the pelvic area" of male teenagers, but discovered in Herzlich's left leg -- has not metastasized, according to his father: "We received very positive news that the cancer has not spread beyond its initial source. The recovery and success rate when the cancer hasn't spread is much higher."

• Survival rates with standard treatment, if the tumor doesn't spread, are 70 to 80 percent, according to a Massachusetts bone cancer specialist.

• A large tumor may prompt the removal of some bone or muscle, obviously devastating to an athlete. But even if the treatment is successful, Herzlich's immediate playing future is most jeopardized by the inevitable chemotherapy: "Everybody does get chemotherapy," [Dr. David] Harmon said. "That's the hard part for a young man trying to do anything athletic."

It seems the best prognosis would be a small "lesion," as Harmon calls it, that doesn't threaten to fracture the leg, in which case "they might not have to do anything that would limit his career."

• But, but ... what's coach doing in purple and gold, mama? One of the interesting byproducts of coaches' cameos in the film version of The Blind Side is that none of the coaches appearing in the movie -- Nick Saban, Ed Orgeron or Phil Fulmer -- is where he was when Michael Lewis chronicled the courtship of Michael Oher back in 2004. Saban, for one, feared his current charges at Alabama -- having been isolated from all outside culture and subjected to periodic memory adjustments since signing with the Tide -- might become a little ... confused to see their imperial magnate stumping for LSU:

"It's a historic event. So it's a part of the history," Saban said before tonight's appearance at a Crimson Caravan event in Montgomery. "I mean, you really can't change history. I explained it to our players, and I think our players understand that. It's just one of those things. It has nothing to do with my love and my passion for the University of Alabama, and our players on our team, I think, understand that as well."

I think a very basic understanding of narrative structure and the routine passage of time is a good bet, coach. I also think it's a good bet that Phil Fulmer lingered a little too long on set after his scenes, just to hang on to that old magic.

• You have proven the rule, sir. Michigan running back Kevin Grady, going out of his way to back up the latest postulation that five-star recruits are more likely to be arrested than drafted, was arrested and jailed this week for failing to report to probation officers or complete community service requirements after pleading guilty last year to driving with a blood-alcohol level over three-and-a-half times Michigan's legal limit.

Grady was a five-star recruit in 2005 and sometimes looked like a competent heir apparent to Mike Hart when Hart was gimpy that fall. But he's fallen completely off the map the last two years and, as a perpetually pudgy, fumbly thumper, and doesn't figure into Rich Rodriguez's plans as a fifth-year senior. Smart money says he's worn the Maize 'n Blue for the last time.

• The puns overwhelm. Gator fans in the very appropriately named Lakeland, Fla. didn't get to meet Urban Meyer Tuesday after a storm flooded the alumni group's power, knocked out the power and cancelled the coach's visit. But that didn't mean they couldn't celebrate their own swamp in several inches of standing water:

About 500 people waded in, many of whom stayed until they were chased away, or felled by packs of mutant mosquitos hatching into their own little Valhalla.

Quickly ... Oregon receiver Aaron Pflugrad has been granted a release to transfer, following his dad, former Ducks receivers coach Robin Pflugrad, who was let go in January. ... Doug Marrone wasn't in Syracuse Thursday to meet his new quarterback (he was talking to a blogger!), but he does think Greg Paulus is a "proven winner." ... Maybe Mark Richt should just break that NCAA ban on attending graduation ceremonies. You know, sometimes rules are made to be broken. ... One of the most Zookian statements ever uttered, or tweeted, or whatever. ... Examining Mine That Bird's Irish roots. ... Conference USA proposes cost-saving measures, including reducing the number of players allowed on travel rosters. ... Video of Gene Chizik and Bo Jackson winning a putting contest of some kind. (Tuck that shirt in, coach.) ... Former Florida running back Elijah Williams has his first head coaching gig, at Oak Ridge High, home of the world's worst-looking practice field. ... Vote on good and bad bets to win next year's mythical championship. ... Alabama linebacker Jennings Hester will go on medical scholarship for "chronic hamstring problems," ending his football career and, shockingly, freeing up a scholarship under the 85-man limit. ... And agents are in what should be a familiar position by now: battling to represent Andre Smith. (Unless, that is, the big guy's mind is already made up.)