• He wuz imgng a QB lol. Last Thursday, the Austin American-Statesman reported police were looking for a driver who crashed a car into an apartment around 2 a.m. Wednesday just off the Texas campus. The car smashed through a co-ed's bedroom, destroying furniture, an iPhone and a computer (though no people, thankfully; go Austin nightlife), after which the driver and passenger(s) pushed the car out and abandoned it down the street.

By Friday night, Texas' Rivals site had confirmed with Sergio Kindle's lawyer ($) that the Longhorns' All-Big 12 linebacker/defensive end was the driver, and the Statesman confirmed Kindle had been treated for a concussion the next day. The unofficial cause of the accident?

According to [attorney Brian] Roark, Kindle was text messaging while driving, lost control of his car and swerved off the road on Rio Grande, near campus, and ran his car into an apartment complex.

I can't claim innocent to Texting While Driving -- though it's yet to cause me to lose track of the multi-story buildings around me -- but Kindle is in a more precarious situation after a DWI arrest in 2007. So are police still looking for him? No, according to his lawyer -- since Kindle struck a stationary object, reported it to owners within a reasonable amount of time (the following morning) and will file an accident report with the Texas Department of Public Safety, it doesn't constitute leaving the scene. Texas coaches are "aware of what happened and ... happy he’s O.K."

So we have a legal adult with a history of reckless driving who loses control of his vehicle in a densely populated area with potentially tragic results and ... no harm, no foul?

• Where will ever find another mustache like that? Paul Maguire, the ex-NFL linebacker and walrus-like color man who brayed inanities from every possible angle during (mostly) Big Ten games, will play a mercifully reduced role in ABC/ESPN broadcasts this year, hopefully allowing Brad Nessler and Bob Griese to complete a sentence that isn't a "sarcastic" insult directed at Maguire for the first time since 2005.

Fearing a walrus-like, ex-NFL linebacker gap, the Mouseketeers will counter by ramping up exposure to another majestic bull of the species:

Actually, since color work is what Matt Millen did before running the Detroit Lions into the ground, I think he'll be just fine. No, I really do.

• Your castoffs are Rick Neuheisel's hypothetical gain. Despite last week's final ruling by Colorado to restrict outgoing receiver/kick returner Josh Smith's transfer to USC and USC only, the university decided it was feeling generous: Smith was granted a release to transfer to UCLA on Friday, where he can be slightly more helpful than in the Trojans' already-stacked receiving/return corps. But the Bruins' hypothetical bounty doesn't end there: Tight end Joseph Fauria, a California native, says he'll probably wind up at a Pac-10 school after getting walking papers from Notre Dame. The L.A. Times says UCLA, just a stone's throw from Fauria's high school, is a likely favorite.

Quickly ... N.C. State linebacker Nate Irving, third on the team last year wuth 84 tackles, suffered a broken leg and collapsed lung in a car accident on Saturday night. ... Quarterback Justin Roper, who started Oregon's first three games last year, will transfer to Division I-AA power Montana and be eligible right away. ... Defensive end Marcus Campbell, a likely starter for UConn, is academically ineligible this fall. ... Kicker Jay Wooten is transferring from North Carolina. ... Rice settled a lawsuit over the weekend with the family of Dale Lloyd II, who died during a workout in 2006. ... South Carolina punter Eric Davis, a walk-on, has already paid a fine and may face a lawsuit after sending a Columbia traffic cop to hospital when Davis failed to yield in a crosswalk in April. ... Georgia picks up a commitment from the top-ranked player in the state, safety Alec Ogletree. ... Anniversary! Black Heart, Gold Pants remembers the Iowa sexual assault coverup, one year later. ... RIP, Billy Mays. ... And not to pile on, but the readers/voters of the Orlando Sentinel have no idea what they're talking/clicking about.