Dr. Saturday - NCAAF

Once again we're gobsmacked by the routine passage of time: Ten years has passed like that, and to commemorate the artificially grouped events therein, the Doc Sat team is counting down the best of 2000-09. Today's category: Best villain.

Matt Hinton: Reggie Bush.
No one could catch him on the field; no one has even laid a finger on him off it. The hype for the dominant 2003-05 Trojans -- especially for the '05 group leading up to its blockbuster Rose Bowl loss to Texas -- built up so much ill will that the first hints of impropriety in the summer of 2006 only whetted haters' appetites for the coming avalanche: By September, the allegations against Bush included fraternizing with agents (sometimes in the USC locker room) while using their largesse to rack up lavish hotel stays, at least one car and a move to a suburban home for his family, enough to fill a book and potentially threaten both Bush's Heisman Trophy and the menagerie of conference and national championships the Trojans won with Bush in the lineup.

But the heart of Bush's villainy for critics lies not in anything he did or didn't do at USC, (including the "Bush Push" to beat Notre Dame in 2005) but in his apparent escape from any official retribution whatsoever despite the overwhelming array of charges and evidence in the media -- three years after the first allegations surfaced, in fact, the NCAA has never acknowledged any impropriety under Pete Carroll, whose program rolls on as one of the two or three enduring gold standards nationally while Bush's pro career is in full, lucrative swing. If there is any forthcoming pain from the NCAA's investigation, it will be from the most painstakingly assembled hammer the Association has ever wielded.

Doug Gillett: Nick Saban.
The villains who have fascinated me the most have always been the ones who manage to win (or at least not lose) in the end, and the one who epitomizes that at the moment in college football is Nick Saban. He'd been given the nickname "Nick Satan" before he even set foot on Alabama's campus, ostensibly for leaving the Dolphins for the 'Bama job just days after categorically denying any interest in it. But be honest, people, that's not the reason you hate him: You hate him because he wins -- a lot -- and unlike, say, vintage Steve Spurrier, he doesn't even display much of a personality while doing so.

See, Spurrier was always more showman than villain; he wanted you to seethe at the very sound of his name, but he also wanted you to laugh at his jokes. Saban quite clearly does not give a flying rat's behind what you think of him, and that goes whether you're an opposing coach, rival fan, member of the national media, member of the local media, or Paul Finebaum. Or, for that matter, an Alabama fan. When your own fanbase is terrified of you, that's some villainy worth tipping your cap to.

Chris Brown: Tim Tebow.
Because you don't have to be evil to be a villain. The qualities that make a good one are that his opponents love to hate him; that he is carefree regarding their opinions; and, in the end, that their worth will be measured against his. For the last three or four years the gate to a college football championship has been guarded by Tebow. His achievements are legion, and, so too, are the vanquished, left full of hate, if not a little respect.

Most of the other candidates for best villain -- Nick Saban, Lane Kiffin, Bobby Petrino, Les Miles, Bob Stoops, Houston Nutt -- have all been humbled by the holy warrior in effective (even if not entirely pretty) performances, which only served to make them all the more infuriating. College football is dominated by coaching personalities, but championships are still won by players, and no player of this decade has dominated (or been as omnipresent) as Tebow. And that's enough to make him the best villain.

Holly Anderson: Jim Delany.
The Big Ten commish is one of the more notably crabby BCS defenders, ostensibly because it would diminish the awesomeness of the regular season, but he's also godfather of the Big Ten Network and therefore responsible for taking valuable regular season football weekends away from far-flung fans of his precious conference. He takes ill-advised swings at certain conferences known for beating the pants off his in bowl games. Oh, and Delany was in charge when the Big Ten expanded to 11 schools, the straight-faced rhetorical ridiculousness of which continues to offend me.

- - -
• Previously on "Best of the Aughts": Best Upset, Best Scandal, Best Innvation.
• Have an offbeat category you'd like to see tackled in the series? Drop me a line: sundaymorningqb -at- yahoo, etc.

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28 Comments

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  1. Ramzy
    1. Posted by Ramzy Wed Oct 28, 2009 3:58 pm EDT

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    "(the SEC) beating the pants off of (the Big Ten) in bowl games."
    Um...
    http://www.sportslinknetwork.com/cfbtrivia/detail.php?teamname=ALL&oppconf=SEC&fry=1995&thy=2009&confname=Big%20Ten&bowl=on&tIA=on&tNIA=on&fcn=on&vcn=on&det=on
  2. Holly
    2. Posted by Holly Wed Oct 28, 2009 4:11 pm EDT

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    If you read those linked Delany quotes and think he's not weirdly defensive and up in arms over the B10 versus the SEC, I don't know what to tell you. (Remember, this was in early 2007.)
  3. mikez34
    3. Posted by mikez34 Wed Oct 28, 2009 4:22 pm EDT

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    The NCAA is really dropping the ball on Reggie Bush. Dez Bryant gets suspended for the year and Reggie Bush gets nothing. So I guess the message is don't get caught in the middle of the season and you'll get alright.
  4. Tim
    4. Posted by Tim Wed Oct 28, 2009 4:23 pm EDT

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    Do players love to hate Tebow? I thought they just loved to play against him for various reasons. The fans I can understand...
  5. Ramzy
    5. Posted by Ramzy Wed Oct 28, 2009 4:25 pm EDT

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    Oh, I agree that Delaney is a little beyotch about absolutely everything. And Ohio State is winless vs. the SEC in bowl games since Jesus was lecturing on thermodynamics in Omaha. But the SEC "doesn't beat the pants off" the Big Ten in bowl games, just Ohio State.
  6. Holly
    6. Posted by Holly Wed Oct 28, 2009 4:30 pm EDT

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    Fair point. I was directing that at Ohio State, and should've just said so, since they're his precious pony and all.
  7. Peter D
    7. Posted by Peter D Wed Oct 28, 2009 4:38 pm EDT

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    Dez got suspended becuase he lied about meeting up with Showtime. Reggie wasnt stupid enough to lie. Simple.
  8. spencerO96
    8. Posted by spencerO96 Wed Oct 28, 2009 4:49 pm EDT

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    isn't the OSU hating getting just a wee bit old?
  9. Spazzy McGee
    9. Posted by Spazzy McGee Wed Oct 28, 2009 5:46 pm EDT

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    I don't so much hate Tebow as the media's perpetual boner for him.
  10. uscskier
    10. Posted by uscskier Wed Oct 28, 2009 7:29 pm EDT

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    You people need to get over it. Reggie is innocent and so is OJ. Just leave them alone.
  11. HERETIC
    11. Posted by HERETIC Wed Oct 28, 2009 7:31 pm EDT

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    I think tebow is a fine person but for the wrong reasons.
    he should by doing his good works just for the sake of
    humanitarian good rather than for some impossible payback
    beyond the grave.
  12. Clifford B
    12. Posted by Clifford B Wed Oct 28, 2009 8:49 pm EDT

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    The more Tebow stinks it up, the harder I find to hate him. But I don't like any of your picks- I mean why single out Reggie Bush? There are probably hundreds of players that got paid by boosters or agents in the time period.
  13. film381
    13. Posted by film381 Wed Oct 28, 2009 8:56 pm EDT

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    GET A LIFE HINTION... using an exclusive British term for American collegiate football does not only LOOK STUPID, but shows just how stupid you are... Gobsmacked !!! Next we know is that you will start ruining the game of soccer like you ruin the American Collegiate game of football...
  14. film381
    14. Posted by film381 Wed Oct 28, 2009 8:56 pm EDT

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    GET A LIFE HINTION... using an exclusive British term for American collegiate football does not only LOOK STUPID, but shows just how stupid you are... Gobsmacked !!! Next we know is that you will start ruining the game of soccer like you ruin the American Collegiate game of football...
  15. _
    15. Posted by _ Wed Oct 28, 2009 11:01 pm EDT

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    Do the idiots in the media actually watch the Florida games or do they just read from a script about Tebow. There are literally 20 quarterbacks who could do just as well or better if they played for Florida. His supposedly awesome statistics are due to Urban Meyer running up the score on no-defense SEC teams. Not to mention most teams give the ball the RB at the 1 yard line.
  16. _
    16. Posted by _ Wed Oct 28, 2009 11:04 pm EDT

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    Tebow IS a villain. He's a lot like A-Rod. A good and possibly great player. But everything about Tebow is manufactured. The cliche ridden speeches. The phony prolonged rah-rah antics after a 1st down. The contrived screaming when he knows the cameras on him. The praising of God yet displaying unbridled arrogance instead of humility
  17. playa4life
    17. Posted by playa4life Thu Oct 29, 2009 12:18 am EDT

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    Tebow IS a villain. We needn't look any further than his "virginity" claim to prove as much. If he is a virgin, his response needs to be one of "gentlemen don't kiss and tell." If he's lying about how many times he's had sex, then he's little better, morally, than a guy who goes around putting roofies in the drinks of the ladies. Now here's the tricky part: if, as far as women are concerned, he's a virgin, but for men, not so much... in other words, if he's gay, then he's actually NOT a villain.
    As far as his mother's doctor telling her that she should abort little Timmy, I'm calling BS. It's too good of a story, it works too perfectly, it fits so snuggly in the pro-life canon, it's too pat.
  18. Paul K
    18. Posted by Paul K Thu Oct 29, 2009 1:35 am EDT

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    Wow don't you reporters have something else to like wipe your ass
  19. marvonl
    19. Posted by marvonl Thu Oct 29, 2009 11:05 am EDT

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    The state of Florida has a history of overrated QB's and underrated receivers, Tebow is maybe the best of that club ( Miami,FSU...) with less than stellar NFL careers. The people only realized it after Charlie Ward won the Heisman but wasn't drafted, then returned to business as usual. Of course Reggie Bush did it but why fret about it? Its business folks! USC lost to an unranked team and are ranked #4, LSU lost to the #1 team and are ranked #9. As in all sports, "SELL MORE JERSEYS GOT MORE PERKS!", always protect the bottom line. Therefore, no sanctions for USC, players can not officially get paid and no playoff for college football. A playoff with the top 16 teams would be nice for everyone but #17. Since we can't resolve the NCAAs' financial conquests and an undisputed #1 peacefully, can we send Florida to the PAC10, USC to the SEC, Texas to the BIG10 and Ohio to the BIG12 for one season? Think about it, that could be better than a playoff!
  20. bignasty9600
    20. Posted by bignasty9600 Thu Oct 29, 2009 3:50 pm EDT

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    None of those people are villians. Tebow can't be...pretty much everyone respects him, fans included. We don't like the media's obsession with him. Bush doesn't count either since it hasn't been proven he did anything...I know this is Yahoo but one reporter's article (only source, an agent that didn't land Bush) isn't gospel truth. Few people care. And Jim Delaney is too obscure to be one...who cares about the Big Ten commissioner.
    Saban is a true villian. Other possibilites: Rich Rodriguez for turning on West Virginia, Lane Kiffin for pissing off everybody, Kellen Winslow for his I'm A Soldier rant, the ACC commissioner John Swofford for raiding the Big East and Charlie Weis for his "schmetic advantage" quote.
  21. tef43
    21. Posted by tef43 Fri Oct 30, 2009 7:05 am EDT

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    The only villains are the pathetic Y! sports bloggers. Go die in a fire, please.
  22. ROBERT G
    22. Posted by ROBERT G Fri Oct 30, 2009 3:14 pm EDT

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    for those who think that reggie bush has escaped, check the website of that california court of appeal, 4th distict,div one, where the lake vs bush civil case lives on alive and well, just ripe to be sent back to the san diego superior court for a very expedited and very public jury trial with reggie and petey and mikey and all sorts of people currently or formerly associated with the usc athletic department hauled in as star witnesses.
    you missed reggie's co villains associated with the usc athletic department, petey and mikey and. of course, kiffin the kkk, who has moved on to tennessee until they kick him out..
    the ncaa did have a payoff racket going on of which the usc coverup department had taken full advantage.
    however, we busted those doors of secrecy down in the civil courts. after a very expensive trial and many appeals by the ncaa, the ncaa finally threw in the towel on 10/15/2009 and made public every single document and transcript related to the ncaa investigation of academic cheating at the florida state athletic department.
    yes, the ncaa did intend to wait on bushgate and usc until hell froze over. however, hell did freeze over on 10/15/2009 for purposes of the ncaa and the conferences and the schools and coaches that cheat being able to use certain obscure federal laws to run their con operations behind closed doors and keep those rivers of cash flowing in their directions.
    as for the fellow who wants yahoo sports posters to die in fires, look in the mirror. your head is on fire, stingy jack.
  23. ROBERT G
    23. Posted by ROBERT G Fri Oct 30, 2009 3:24 pm EDT

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    delany is just getting nervous about his and dave parry's nationwide dishonest officiating con operation being exposed and about being relieved of all of those fancy material possessions.
    saban sold his soul to the devil years ago in exchange for winning at football by cheating, but saban forgot to put in a live forever clause, making him look sour all the time, as if saban is looking into hellfire.
    after all, the thrill of winning got old long ago, along with the money and material possessions and, unlike heaven, hell and the devil will not wait, not even for saban.

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